This year for most of the time I haven't done that. It's pretty hard to do that when you're stuck with thoughts of the past or anticipations of the future. I feel like I've finally let all that out of my system though. Time won't wait for me to straighten myself up. I'm ready to live in this moment without looking back to the past and thinking about how happy I was or whatever, those moments are gone. They will always be with me and I'll never forget them but thinking about them the way I used to interferes with my reality right now. I have let them go. As for the future, I could get hit by a bus tomorrow. I'm sick of looking forward to all these plans and goals that aren't even real yet. So far they are just a fantasy. I want to look forward to just waking up each day and being satisfied with things as they are. I'm done worrying about what will happen if I decide to do this or that. If you're on the right track and if something is making you happy then how can it be wrong for you? Even if it doesn't last it was still right for you in that moment and I think that's one of my biggest mistakes. Not being able to accept the fact that moments aren't made to last forever. Memories are though.
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